Harper Update

I didn't post about our appointments last week mostly because I was discouraged and emotional and I tend to get a little dramatic when I'm like that. Harper didn't grow as much as we were hoping and I really took the news hard. I was just really, really scared. I know what it means when a baby doesn't grow inside of you...it means they have to grow outside of you and this is a scenario that I am really hoping to avoid this time around. So when Harper had dropped back down to the 10th percentile and growth wasn't what it should be, I panicked a little bit.

I've just been treading along the last few weeks and months almost ignoring what the very near future holds for us and now it is almost time to face it...and I just don't feel ready. I'm not physically ready, I'm not mentally ready, and I'm certainly not emotionally ready. But that's the thing about life sometimes...it doesn't care if you're ready. And I've come to learn that the ability to adjust is much more vital than always being ready.

But I went ahead and drug out a carseat and thoroughly washed it because that's all you really need to take a baby home from the hospital anyway. So now I'm officially ready.

Nevermind that we have one bathroom completely gutted down to the studs, that because of the construction there is a layer of dust so thick covering every inch of our house that you could play tic-tac-toe in it, we have an unpainted baby room stacked to the ceiling with unready baby stuff and unassembled furniture, and the only reason we have blankets for this girl is because I cried to Nemo the other day that Harper didn't have any blankets and of course Nemo has since then purchased eight beautiful, pink baby blankets. Seriously, Amy? Crying over blankets? 

And I went back to the doctor today, knowing that they wouldn't measure her again becuase they do that only every other week. But Dr. Killeen, my very calm, very reassuring, very optimistic doctor told me that he wasn't worried. And I told him, "that makes one of us." He says that as long as her blood flow looks good, that he feels good about it.

So I went downstairs for my next appointment and they did a sonogram and guess what...her dopplars (cord blood flow and brain blood flow) looked the best they have yet. They were all in the normal range meaning she is getting just what she should. Blood flow through the cord is directly related to growth, so I'm optimistic that she's growing. In addition to that, her fluid levels are great, her kidneys are great, her liver is great, her heart is good (ish), and she's very active. So today was a better day.

I knew there would be ups and downs along the way. It's just that I had gotten so spoiled with constant positive reports. I'm 32 weeks tomorrow. (How did that happen already? I'm pretty sure I lost a week somewhere.) Every week further along we can make it is a huge victory to me! We'll just continue to pray that Harper grows and stays inside as long as possible!

Here are a few pictures of me and Harper from the last few weeks:

(29 weeks pregnant)

(30 weeks pregnant)

(31 weeks pregnant)